I'm So Tired

When we were first assigned the dreaded word paper, I didn't think it would be so bad. Then I promptly forgot about it, aside from choosing a word and a novel and asking everyone else what theirs were. Now we actually have a due date (sources check this Monday) and I'm understanding why it drives people crazy. There's just so much work that goes into it. I did get my dad to take me to the library tonight, so I'm doing better now. At least not panicking anymore.

Going to the library did mean missing Steve Boettcher's wake, but I don't know if I'd have gone, anyway. I didn't go to Kari's, either. Something about when a person dies...suddenly he/she is not even a person anymore, but an icon, idealized and constantly referred to in the context of death. I'm glad I didn't have to face Laurie and Mrs. Boettcher, though. That will come eventually, but I hate those receiving lines at wakes where you find yourself face to face with the relatives of the deceased. At least at school or church I can avoid direct contact with them.

This has nothing to do with anything, but lately I've noticed several similarities between James, my friend from camp, and Will, a classmate and fellow Quiz Bowler. Both are tall and dark and fairly quiet. Both sit leaned back with one leg across the other. Both say interesting things all the time. Both seem fearless. Both laugh loudly, with their heads thrown back. Both intimidate me and make me feel awkward. (I'm constantly doing stupid things around Will; today I accidentally knocked a pen across the table in bio and, during QB practice, spilled Sprite all over myself and Emily.) Both intimidate me. You know what's a weird word when you say it often enough? Both.

Aside from general homework and the word paper, I've been frazzled this week because of newspaper stuff. We're going to miss our deadline tomorrow. We had the paper pretty much put together, and then today several well-meant but badly timed events occurred: Andrew, Liam, and Brandon turned in long articles, far too late; Mr. Harnish viewed the draft of the paper and made several changes; and Hayley lengthened the paper to sixteen instead of twelve pages, which means more work filling up the whole thing and getting it done. Mr. Fischer called the printer and postponed our deadline, which just makes me feel worse. Oh, well. In the wise words of Scarlett O'Hara, "Tomorrow is another day."